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Happier reflections

Why is the pensive associated with regret  remorse and longing? Why does reflections have to be laced with a brim of sad? Let's change that! 

We are fast pressing on to 6 months!!! Time flew!!! ^^ Haha, this blog is almost becoming a relationship blog. I think that represents the proportion of my life that has been filled because of you. Hehe, more about that later. Let me try to inject a bit of balance first.

2020 has been a year of 圆满, balanced in its expression, full in its experience. Life has been tough enough for everyone. I'm glad everyone got to where we are and managed to adapt through it. This year, I express my gratitude for my country, which has proven to execute thoughtful functional kiasu through crisis. I'm thankful that we are where we are not by luck but by design. I'm thankful for the many dumps that I sat in professionally, for they have honed a greater sense of balance in my decision making. I accept that I'm always the feeler, and I should moderate my feeling by 50 percent everytime something makes me want to react. I'm thankful to have the few good friends whom I can count on as being my real good friends. I love how we connect in shared values and commitment to sisterhood, and I love how we can embrace each other in spite of our surface differences. I'm thankful for my beloved and precious family, my brother making progress in his personal and professional life (I can't be more proud!!), and my mother who has taken many first steps out for her own physical and mental health. Dear God, please give me a few more decades with mummy. 

Saving the best for last, my greatest blessing this year (and this lifetime), is you. ^^ 写出来就好想哭哦。Dear dear, thank you for letting me into your world, and for coming into mine with acceptance and so much love. I still don't know how I got so lucky; but boy, do I treasure it. The past 6 months has been a humble journey of self discovery, mutual discovery and joint creation for both of us. As we walk along the path to our future together, I take the lesson that love is not a video game, designed with milestones and levels of bosses to clear. Sometimes, just because we got to the stronger boss, does not mean that we will not encounter earlier levels again and have to work together to get through it. For we are human. We learn lessons, forget them, relearn and repeat this until it becomes part of our identity. And that's just the natural cycle of things! :) all we need to do is not give up. And in this journey, I cannot be more thankful that my partner is you. Thank you for exhibiting the tenacity to go with me through hurdles after hurdles and never giving up. I'm thankful for all the times you would patiently listen to me (yes you do), even though we may passionately discourse. I know fully well that my ideals are frustratingly idealistic and jarring, I know how hard it must be for you and all your level headedness to bear, but thank you for always taking the time to engage me and not walk away. Thank you for massaging many graveyards with me, and trusting me to massage yours (and you) too. Thank you for loving me. Thank you for being you, the very simple you that I can love wholeheartedly. Thank you for being my anchor, my compass, my wind and my sail all wrapped in one. I love you much much dear dear :) 

<3

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